Time and Distance

Has anyone of you ever wonder, why time and distance could cause so much pain? Or is it because you or someone else is not fighting hard enough? 

Maybe life weren't meant to always be perfect even if you make it to be. A little dissapointing to say but life aint easy even when you try to always be positive. 

I thought today that its time i let everything go. And if i am gone today, tomorrow or whenever, that i will know the ways of life, accept it and be glad to say in my mind that i've done this thing called life! 

xoxo

Amberstories

Scoliosis

Scoliosis

A term often heard and familiar with. I was first diagnosed with it last year. October 10, 2013. And here is my story;

Vulnarable, another word used to describe the state i am in now. Yes everyone would say to me, be strong Amber. Dont let others know you are suffering and dont use your suffering as a way for you to be sympathize. 

What i have to say here is that NO i dont want to be sympathize and i dont want anyone to know how much pain i endure every single day especially not the ones i loved. 

I just wish i am not vulnarable. Less emotional and and less sensitive of everything around me. To be honest, i am happy when people around me are happy and people i love are happy. Its okay if i have to be unhappy and its okay that i loose a little freedom for myself just so they could be happy. Because i am happy!

Life is though. Sometimes i ask Him why does everyone that i love with my heart or start loving with my heart somehow end up leaving? Why do i have to constantly watch the ones i loved leave? 

Have i not have faced everything enough on my own? Maybe i am meant to be alone for awhile now. I am an attached person. I like being around people that i know and are comfortable with. 

People come and go. I am just one of the lucky ones who have to face it the hard way. 

One thing in life for me is, that, when the day comes for me to leave instead, i wish and pray for everyone i've loved and lost and who leaved that they will be happy always and lived a life they've dreamt of. 

Till the day that i die, i wish you all the happiness and love. 

Because with that i am happy and loved 

Amberstories

Gone

If i am gone from this world tomorrow, know that i love you

If i am gone from this world today,

know that i love you too

And if this world means that you and i were not meant to be,

Know that in my heart you are meant to be

Sometimes life takes us by surprise and i hope i brought a little sunshine into your life

As you took away the darkness in mine. I loved you, i love you and i forever will

xoxo

Amberstories

Sports & Other Things

Hey there bloggers,

At one point in every swimmers life, we would come across a point where we no longer want to compete. We would swim but would not compete. 

As a "retired" swimmer as i am, i was asked to compete in my country university sports competition which is held every 2 years. SUKIPT as it is called was a big event held especially for all undergrad and grad students to shine especially in sports. 

Competing in 3 swimming event with 1 individual event i couldnt imagine myself winning with the fact that i have stopped training for 5 years. In other words, i didnt win and same goes to my relay team but we were proud to compete with olympic and national swimmers. 

The experience is something i'll never regret and meeting new friends and old friends makes the competition a memorable one :) 

Thank you God for everything and USM for the oppurtunity. 

Up next is to train hard for my upcoming event. Once a swimmer and always a swimmer. I guess i never really quit swimming afterall. 

Merry Late Christmas

Hey bloggers/readers

I know it might be abit late now to wish all of you a happy merry christmas and new year. Well its still early for new year and i just felt like i need to share a little bit of everything.

My finals is coming this 31Dec and i am like ARGHHH but anyway i just want to share that this year's Christmas is a whole lot different. For the first time in my life i spent my christmas without my family members. As sad as it sounds it was still an awesome Christmas because church friends were really awesome when they welcome me to their homes and bought me presents.

On Christmas day i went out with my malay friend, kak Tasya who celebrated it with me and we talk all night over a bowl of sweet sweets. 

Yesterday i had my proper christmas dinner with Visha and we had TGIF and Morganfields at the same day. A little cocktail and good food. I feel alot like home. 

I had a great time and i couldnt ask for a better one. Thank you daddy God for blessing me with all these people and i cheerished every moment of it. 

Lesson learnt that at every moment you are awake, seized it and be ever grateful for what comes will not always stay but what come must be made the best for. 

Merry chirstmas lovelies. And HAPPY BIRTHDAY JESUS

xoxox

Amberstories

Church Family

Church. Mary Voon

Sweets for Christmas Night

TGIF with Visha

Too many Cocktails for the night in Morganfields

What The Heart Felt

I dont know why you keep coming up on my mind. I really dont need this. What i need is to focus myself on so many other things. But somehow every time i pray about it, God just keep pushing, letting the little things around me to remind me of you. Your name keep popping up, the things you do are played right in front of my eyes.

I dont know what it means but i know one thing that, maybe you are made to be mine but just not now but maybe even not ever. Maybe i think you are but you have never. People say people change, you definitely have. The past 9 months seems to change who you are, the one i have known earlier. I guess you have become a man.

I guess all i can do for now is to never give up on you, be the girl at the side line, smile and hope that you are happy always. Pray that you'll always be safe. I promise to be the girl who would fix your bow tie/tie, the girl who panics when you cut or bleed and offers you a band aid, the girl who would carry your back pack when you go shopping, the girl who would walk and shop with you, the girl who would share her food and drinks with you even if you dont want it, the girl who would laugh at your sarcastic jokes, the girl who would keep quite and smile even if you merely joke/tease her in front of public and i will always be the girl who would spend every moment she have just so you wont be alone. Always be the girl that you'd last picked. :')

I'll always be praying for you and someday i hope you'll remember me the least as your friend. The girl who you could count on any time you need.

From the start to the end i wish you all the happiness and i hope that if you have found your girl, that she will always make you a better man. Because YOU deserve someone better. Someone better than me.

Pictures of us are the perfect memory for me right now. I could just wish you would read this but if you ever read this someday somehow somewhere i hope you know its for you and i hope i'd still be around to say to you personally that this is for you.

You will always be my SUPERMAN. ALWAYS.

xxxx

Its November

So hey bloggers,

Its night here in Penang, but some thoughts run through my head and yes i'd like to point out that, people say Uni life changes who you are. But for me as for now its more like discovering what my potentials are and who i really want to be.

In the process i realize that i really love singing and as weird as it sounds i enjoy doing presentations :) other wise i fell in love all over again with my swim team training programme in USM and as for physical and fashion wise i actually got my hair highlighted red and i loooove loooove looove baggy 'Aladdin' pants. 

Someone once told me in class that i dont belong and i dont look like i deserve to be in my course or my minor course, but you know what, hey i am just special. I might not look like one but brains are as equal importance :) besides i really do like arts and performance! 

USM have given me so many chances in alot of things like Rangoli Fest and emcee for indonesian night and upcoming international gala night :) big stuff and i am so glad to be part of it.

Friendship wise i guess that i found soo MANY AMAZING FRIENDS who accepts me as who i am and it's great! Wouldnt have done it without you guys! ConvEx PNK family, Visha, Swim Team, Adikarma, International Buddies and Indonesian friends. Course mates and all :) 

As for above all i rest my case that i would have not done it without God. People say i'd go astray if i dont go to church, i say i have Him in my heart and thats all that matters. He will always be there. I am ever thankful! Thank you Daddy God :)

P/s if you read my blog, the mysterious guy is coming back. Hope to see you if you are reading this (: 

All and all i still miss my besties and have a great night!

Remember its a journey, as you go along do what you love :) 

xoxo Amberstories 

The Red Hairs

Rangoli Fest

Kolam making

The crazy pnk family

They say i am an art student but i am not. But i like art. I do this often