THIS IS IT

Just when everynight i was about to close my eyes that are soo tired, things come running across my mind. i need to make my decision right now. NOW. This is more than what i think it would be. Is my future, my life. A new start. A new life. I have to admit it is a great opportunity and bright future but yet again i admit that i am afraid. Very afraid that it might not work out. Or m i really ready for such a big change? achange that could mean so much. Good and bad.


But somehow i know, this time its about me. for me. what i want and what i really want to do. Not decision made by someone for me. but instead a decision made by me for myself. so what ever the consequences is i m ready to take full responsibility and courage about it. I promise myself that. and i will make it happen.


I know that i make my life a story. I am the writer. and i will make things happen. Every life has its own story and every story comes to life. Quick check in reality.. sometimes even fairytale story happen in life but we just missed it out in life. Just be it. God and me= my life

Natural

Somehow today i realize as i upload those pictures on facebook. The smile in it seems more happy and and natural. Its like it made me smile just by looking at it. Back then when i am in pictures or shall i say i look back at my other pictures it doesnt seems natural. I mean it all looked like i forced the smile out. I know i sounded all so pathetic but really it made me smile. I guess that the differences in places changes my personality and changes life. Its good to actually feel now that i am ready to start a new. Let go of my past and move forward. Dare to dream big. And make my dream come true. Make it a reality. Be strong and make my own decision. Without doubt make my future something i always wanted. England a very good place to start a new. I cant wait and i pray i will stay.

Well just a food for taught. Dreams make future we make dreams come true :) <3

Andrea & Beverly

I woke up today and felt that i need to write this. I need too.. Well maybe because i realised how much this blog is about.. Its time for me to say a little more about what i really meant, "my stories my life". Well... I here goes.. Every night i think about whats life here in this city but then i think again back in KK where i'll have my best friends to support me. 2011 is going to be interesting. because 2010 is much more than i've ever expected. Its when people say i am strong. Yes Andrea (If u are reading this :)) i know you would say i am but i still dont see it. But the difference now is that i know the reason why. Its because i HATE growing up.. I dont want to grow up and be old.. People like my age clings to an adult but i, I had to put up with clinging to myself.

Just once i'd like to just hear some one say "Hold my Hand" because i am still a little girl in me..Thats how its suppose to be. I dont understand why some people my age wants to grow up. Why? Kids have more fun. They play, they have nothing to worry about and they are at their closest to God. I want to be a KID! This is the one thing i'll miss in KK. because surely i know, You Andrea & Bev, you would always hold my hands. Everytime i needed.. Now. I am alone again. But i will never let go of your hands. I miss u guys alot more than i think i ever did..I just had to write this.

LOVE ALWAYS

Woopsie!

Hello Hello!!

So as i think everyone has relise its been a loong time since i BLOG! well yea... soo today i m going to blog about NEW YEAR IN LONDON! Its been a very tiring one yet satisfying! Even though i had to wait and stand for 4 hours just to see the fire works but it was WORTH it! Its beautiful and i LOVE it.. I really m considering staying here in UK because the people are SUPER nice and they've got my Chinese food and a better education and entertainment. I'll miiss my friends i know that but its really a great place to start a new and to be more successful. After all theres nothing worth looking forward too in KK.. Honestly..

But what ever it is. I pray and hope for the best.. Ohh and theres this big toy shop call HAMLEY! check it out! They have a section just for HARRY POTTER!!! They sell the broomsticks to even the sorting hat! How cools  that!! Its a 6 storey toy store and its cool!! I love it there!! And the view of London at night its BREATH TAKING! Check those pictures out!



PS: SORRY SOME PICTURES ARE UPSIDE DOWN!

I HAD FUN

Dear blog,
I am finally in England now.. Its been 4 days too.. God i had soo much to tell.. Well first was, my flight was actually delay.. It was suppose to land at Stansted Airport.. But due to the heavy snow, we were directed to Birmingham Airport wich is far north of stansted.. It took another 30 minutes.. Not only that, our luggage was delayed again for an hour.. I was practically awake for 46 hours straight.. Got a coach to stansted and went home..


The next day was fun though.. Watch movies with my cousin and played games.. We went out on monday. To town, Peterborough and went bowling.. I am soo sorry i couldnt put up pictures because GOSH DAMN I FORGOT MY CAMERA CABLE!
But no worries next time, i go out, i'll use my handphone as camera :)

It snowed today, and i did have some fun with it, My aunt is going to cook us noodle for today!! yippie!! :)

And  maybe i might not come back because my aunt and uncle actually had plans on adopting me.. soo its all up to me to decide.. i dont know.. :( :) but i am glad though that someone actually wants me :)

Will update more soon :)

Love from Sawtry, UK.
Amber
ps: its 5.34pm

Two More Days

Dear Blog,

My heart ache today, because i realise that i actually have less than 2 days before leaving for London :( and that is sad because i really will miss Malaysia, My school and most importantly MY FRIENDS.  I know i sounded all soo ungrateful because everyone that know i am leaving says "Hey you are going to London. If i were you i'd love it".

SERIOUSLY.. If you are in my shoes, you'd feel the way i do too. I wont be seeing all the sunshines, the pool and the fun. Yes its a new experience but i am quite content with just hanging out with my friends the whole year.. But LONDON, seems like a new place to start a new and feel new.. Somehow to create a new me. I know in my heart, LONDON HERE I COME..

Maybe i am just exaggeration much.. Somehow i seriously feel like i will never want to let go.. I remember talking to Leonnie about what i really felt in my heart.. And i told her that the ONE thing i will never let go and that i am afraid to let go is forgetting papa when i start a new.. I dont want to forget pappa and all the memories we had together.. papa is in my heart but if i start a new by means i will open my heart to others and eventually forget about him

I can never forget him and I WILL NEVER FORGET HIM! Malaysia, Sabah is where i will always remember papa..Because he is my PAPA and always will be!
Papa, this i promise you, that when i am in London, I will make sure that i will NEVER forget you!
Papa I love you!

For The Last Time

Today was sad.. real sad.. My sister broke the news i cant be going to curtin for studies.. which means i'll be apart from my besties.. and i REALLY HATE IT!! I thought i had the chance too but i dont! So this might be the last i'll see her again.. :(



I am sure this feeling will never fade.. After all i've been through with them.. I need them surely in my heart.. what ever the circumstances are i will never forget them.. They were there in the midst of everything i've been through... I miss them.. deeply..

When i look back... I know they'll be in my heart just like both my parents.. I love you Beverly.. I love you Andrea