A term often heard and familiar with. I was first diagnosed with it last year. October 10, 2013. And here is my story;
Vulnarable, another word used to describe the state i am in now. Yes everyone would say to me, be strong Amber. Dont let others know you are suffering and dont use your suffering as a way for you to be sympathize.
What i have to say here is that NO i dont want to be sympathize and i dont want anyone to know how much pain i endure every single day especially not the ones i loved.
I just wish i am not vulnarable. Less emotional and and less sensitive of everything around me. To be honest, i am happy when people around me are happy and people i love are happy. Its okay if i have to be unhappy and its okay that i loose a little freedom for myself just so they could be happy. Because i am happy!
Life is though. Sometimes i ask Him why does everyone that i love with my heart or start loving with my heart somehow end up leaving? Why do i have to constantly watch the ones i loved leave?
Have i not have faced everything enough on my own? Maybe i am meant to be alone for awhile now. I am an attached person. I like being around people that i know and are comfortable with.
People come and go. I am just one of the lucky ones who have to face it the hard way.
One thing in life for me is, that, when the day comes for me to leave instead, i wish and pray for everyone i've loved and lost and who leaved that they will be happy always and lived a life they've dreamt of.
Till the day that i die, i wish you all the happiness and love.
Because with that i am happy and loved
Amberstories
